For the most part, my life has been a variety of disappointment and reflection. I’d find myself in situations where I’d be so intent on starting certain project’s. This was very easy with my imagination and objectivity. However, my concentration and focus are like these cognitive mishaps that my mind is caught up in. And if not for the second time around, my life would be in quite a bit of turmoil.
I remember passing my drivers’ test on the third time and since this happened I started to see a trend on my competency. Back to when I was young, my father called me a blooming idiot…! not to mention the countless other names. I’ve always revered the different ways there are to call someone stupid. And, the fact that he never swore or used vulgar language. This trend was realized after I had a heart valve replacement. This is where I found my Aortic valve and my whole aortic artery is smaller than normal and did not put enough oxygenated blood to my brain. This was a problem in my overall mental state of mind.
Speaking of healthcare, especially back in the year’s 1980 – 1990, I was under a very good health plan. After the surgery, I was disappointed and confused about why this happened. I was asking about the aortic valve and the artery that was said to be too small…undersize is the term used. Now, as I write this blog I am thinking about this situation in a very different way. I may have overlooked my predicament without understanding and that…to me is definitely not in my character.
So…the whole point I have tried to convey here is based on the fact that my cognitive function is on a very narrow curve. Meaning, my brain function is on the line between acceptable and having a mental disability. And, using the second time around is basically how I have coped with this problem. I’m pretty sure that there are other people like me, who have dealt with this before. Actually, I’m pretty sure my father had a problem that he kept hidden for a long time. But, of course that is another story.